Are we really already halfway through this deployment?
I cannot believe it. I mean, I’m super jazzed that this is almost over, but damn! I still remember dropping you off at the armory that first day. I remember it so clearly and vividly.
I was so worried. I had no idea what to expect. I was worried mostly about you. I didn’t really know what you would be flying into. I still am not fully aware. That’s a good thing, I guess. One thing I am so thankful for is our communication. I wasn’t sure if we would be able to talk every week, let alone every day. I’m glad we have been able to Skype and call and message each other throughout this whole process. I never thought I would ever be so thankful for Facebook.
These past months have been a little rough, especially with the holidays. Seeing other couples spending Christmas together, or sharing a kiss on New Year’s Eve have been tough. I’m not ashamed to say that I get jealous when I see a couple walking down the street holding hands. Now, I’m not saying any of this is your fault, by any means. I have never, and will never blame you for your duty. Never. I understand this life and I don’t resent you or any of it. I’m proud of you, and I love you. But it’s a new normal for us, and it takes some getting used to.
Three months ago, I had some ideas of things I wanted to accomplish while you were away. I wanted to get back into a routine at the gym, choose an online university to complete my degree, get a new bed and reorganize my room, get my online shop running, and grow my hair. So far, I bought a new bed, and my hair is maybe an inch or two longer. January really sneaked up on me.
I was feeling a little disappointed in myself for not accomplishing these things sooner, but I still have time. I’m pulling myself out of the holiday blues and getting my butt in gear.
So now we’re in the home stretch and all I can think about is how life will be when you come home. I am so excited for life with you. I daydream about things we’ll do and trips we’ll take. But most of all, I can’t wait to do normal things with you. Like driving to the beach, or watching a movie on the couch, or having breakfast together. Such normal things that we take for granted.
I’m literally counting down the days until we can do something as simple as holding hands. I will appreciate our time together so much more. Don’t get me wrong, seeing you every day is always special, and I love it, but now, when I see you, it will be more. This has only strengthened our relationship in a way that I think couples who don’t go through a deployment, or any lengthy separation will experience.
So let’s get through these last few months. I’m hoping they fly by. And babe, how lucky are we? We get to have our first kiss all over again! I can’t wait.